"Dear Students, Faculty, and Staff,
Ahh, Yea. So the College will open at our normal time today, February 13, 2017 it looks like. Grounds and Custodial staff have been in overnight and through their, frankly, crazy efforts - like I don't know why they just don't stay home and get some rest, what the hell are they trying to prove anyways - the roads, lots, and walkways are in safe and usable condition. The public roads around campus are in good condition and traffic is moving well. And Staff will continue to work throughout the morning to address the clean-up. So yea, we have no real reason to close today unfortunately. Have good fucking day everyone, this fucking sucks."
John B. Carter
Police Chief/Director of Public Safety
Chief Carter was seen later that day angrily kicking a snow plow whilst other officers tried unsuccessfully to pull him away from the vehicle.
*Update**Update*
"Watch out for that "sneaky black ice" warns Chief Carter, its nothing like fluffy, un-aggressive white snow; black ice is intrusive and quite frankly a threat to our nice white snow neighborhoods and Amherst College police won't tolerate it." states Chief Carter while four officers behind him beat a single unresisting patch of black ice with their batons.
*Update**Update**Update**Chief Carter Interview*
KR: Chief Carter what is your response to the recent outbreak of I.C.E. raids throughout the country in the past few days? Do you believe I.C.E. is a threat to current DACAmented and Undocumented students, faculty and staff?
JC: No, no ice is not a threat to any students on campus today, what are those DACA and undocumented students even complaining about? Facilities are salting the roads and pathways, and as I already stated that dangerous black ice isn't sneaking its way into my school. No further questions
